Dr. David Schnarch, PhD

This article first appeared on PsychologyToday.com Dear Dad, Not long ago I finished a long and difficult therapy session with a husband and wife who run a highly successful business. Aside from their marriage falling apart, the man was a fairly poor father, and both their fathers were even worse. In this session the man finally acknowledged he hungers and grieves for public acclaim and recognition. “I want to be a great man,” he said, admitting how he wanted to be seen by others. “No,” I replied, “You want to be a famous man.” “That’s right. To me, they’re one and the same,” he acknowledged. “I know that,” I said, “but being famous and being a great man can be

Back from Taiwan I spent the first half of December in Taiwan. When I wasn’t in the wonderful mountains of Taroko National Park, I was teaching a one-day workshop for professional counselors and presenting at the Taipei Women’s Rescue Foundation Conference. Temples throughout the island are incredibly beautiful as is the scenery. I have 900+ pictures to prove it. (I’ve placed some samples on my personal page).  Food is everything in Taiwan. Each day is one continuous process of eating. They just change the menu several times. Taiwan exports the majority of orchids throughout the world, and the acres and acres of the International Floral Expo were in full bloom. To say I had a good time is an understatement.

What are the Crucible 4 Points of Balance? Holding on to yourself in relationships One of the most important things in life is becoming a solid individual. And another important thing is to have meaningful relationships. Two of the most powerful human drives are our urge to control our own lives (autonomy), and our urge for relationship with others (attachment). One of the biggest tasks of adulthood is being able to balance these two urges, and one of the most common problems is having too much of one, and not enough of the other. People often feel claustrophobic or controlled in committed relationships, or feel like they can’t be their true self in their relationships, or feel like their sense